birthday season

Yesterday it seemed all the Google products I wanted to use were taking a mental health day -- including the search engine itself, the calendar, and Blogger.  Maybe it was just me, but I'm sure glad they seem to be back in business today.

In our family, January 11th is a momentous day.  It's my mother's birthday and parents' wedding anniversary.  They celebrate 35 years of marriage in 2010.  Theirs is a testament to the faithfulness of the married vocation through all of life's seasons and all the ups and downs they present.   I pray Christ will continue to bless them with an awareness of his presence with them, and with profound joy for length of days. 

The longer I am a mother, the more I come to understand my own mother (though I will not be so presumptuous as to say I completely understand her.  Who can totally understand another person anyway?  Only Christ.).  She is a lady of great sensitivity, humor, wit, intelligence, resourcefulness, and deep concern for those she loves.  I wish for her only good things, abiding peace, an understanding of how much she is loved and cherished, and continued faith in the Creator who loves her. 

So no matter the technical difficulties.  We celebrate a "birthday season" around here.  All my love to you, Mom and Dad.  Peace be with you both.

favorite picture book series: My First Little House

One of our favorite series of picture books is My First Little House, from Laura Ingalls Wilder's original Little House books.  These picture books are marketed for three- to eight-year-olds, (though they appeal to all ages), and give a glimpse of Laura and Almanzo's (Wilder -- her future husband) lives as children.  Lately we have out Christmas in the Big Woods, but we've also liked Sugar Snow, Summertime in the Big Woods, Going to Town, Farm Boy, and Going West, among others.

Thinking about the life Laura and her family lived on the frontier helps me keep things in perspective some days.  When her mother is busy making cheese or butter or even just doing the wash load and caring for her three children (later four) without the conveniences of modern life (such as an enclosed vehicle to travel in), it can snap me out of any pity party I might be inclined to host for myself. I draw great inspiration from her. 

My bambini marvel at the way of life Laura and her family lived (as do I) and enjoy the beautiful illustrations. As they grow up, I look forward to sharing the original Little House books with them if they're interested.  These picture books are a wonderful introduction to that innocent, hard-working world of Laura's childhood over a century ago.

fresh books

Our latest library haul includes several books published in 2009.  We're still working through the sack, but here are some of our favorites so far:

Otis by Loren Long.  A "vintage" tractor gives long and faithful service on a farm, only to be replaced by a bigger, yellow tractor.  The little tractor had served as security blanket for an orphan calf, which takes comfort in the soft purring noise the tractor makes when it sleeps in the barn next stall over from the calf.  The yellow tractor scares the calf.  When the little calf goes missing, Otis the vintage tractor purrs to the rescue.  The illustrations are captivating, and my lads have asked for repeated readings of this book -- as in, we get to the end and they say "let's read it again!"  That's what I call "a ringing endorsement."

I am a space program junkie -- at least, early space program.   I plowed through Apollo 13 (and have the movie memorized), read The Right Stuff (but found the movie a little less captivating than Apollo 13), and speed-read James Michener's Space for a book report in senior year English (though I wouldn't recommend that).  Imagine, then, my delight at Moonshot by Brian Floca, which chronicles the Apollo 11 space mission -- the one in which they actually land on the moon.  Densely (but wonderfully) illustrated and scripted, this one handily holds my four-and-a-half year old's attention.  Floca is also author/illustrator of Five Trucks, which my lads liked very much, among others.

Martin Waddell's The Super Hungry Dinosaur is a silly little story.  We are in the throes of dinosaur mania here, to the point where I of all people can distinguish among a triceratops, a brontosaurus, and a stegosaurus.  (This is another area of skill-building I never foresaw -- one that parallels the vast knowledge and quick recall I have of various breeds of dually trucks and other big rigs).  Anyhow:  A Tyrannosaurus Rex threatens to devour young Billy's dog, mother, and father, but quick-witted Billy and his willing four-legged sidekick forestall the dinosaur's intended destruction by some quick work with a garden hose.  Not to be a spoiler here, but no children, parents, dogs, or dinosaurs are harmed in the devouring of this book.  It's a fun one.  Leonie Lord's illustrations bring it all to life.  I daresay my lads envision themselves fending off dinosaurs in the backyard with a garden hose and that dog they keep asking for. 

Harry and Horsie by Katie Van Camp is another fun, whimsical story.  Horsie is Harry's ever-present sidekick and cohort.  When they break out the Super Duper Bubble Blooper one night, Horsie is caught up in a bubble and swept out the window!  Harry rushes to the rescue, blasting off into space after his raggedy friend.  Lincoln Agnew's comic book-like illustrations really serve the story well, giving it a vintage vibe with a modern day twist.

And one that's been out for about five years now but fresh in my mind is Halibut Jackson by David Lucas.  Halibut is a shy but crafty lad (as in, skilled with needle and thread), so he fashions outfits for himself that allow him to blend into the background of whatever environment he's in.  Finding him among the various settings is part of the fun -- he goes to the library, the market, and the park.  When he's invited to a party at the palace, he decides to craft for himself a suit evoking the palace itself.  He doesn't know, though, that the party is going to be out on the palace grounds, so he is anything but inconspicuous come party time.   These illustrations are so intriguing to me.  I could sit and stare at each page for untold lengths of time (hypothetically-speaking, of course).

always an exciting sighting

Today I returned a sack o'books to the big regional library not too far from us with the drive-up book drop on the way to retrieve the elder lad from preschool.  The younger lad (the one who had declared "I don't want to nap!" at siesta time) was out cold in the back seat, and even though I had a trip planned to our local library for "fresh" books, as we call them, after school, I wanted to drop off the big load beforehand for simplicity's sake.

Three huge firetrucks were parked in the big library's lot.  None of them had lights or sirens on -- it wasn't an emergency.  The firefighters must've been inside the library.  When I related this story to the lads after school, I mused aloud "maybe they were there for a program or something." 

The elder lad had a different hypothesis:

"Maybe they were there for fresh books.  Not picture books.  Firefighter books."

He might just be right.

Mass with bambini

We Catholics call our communal worship service "Mass" or the Sacred Liturgy*.   It's offered every day of the year except Good Friday and Holy Saturday (until the Easter Vigil begins, in many places after sundown on Holy Saturday).  We go weekly, though I love to go to daily Mass whenever I can (which isn't often these days).

For me, Mass has long been a source of great spiritual sustenance and strength.  I try to keep up with the daily readings at home, though doing so with greater regularity should be one of my New Year's resolutions.  The readings are the first part of Mass, followed by the Eucharist -- what we believe to be Jesus's body and blood in the form of consecrated bread and wine. 

This is one of the central tenets of our faith, one we strive to impart to our children through our faithful attendance of Mass and the living of the Gospel day in and day out.  When we go to Mass each weekend, we go to worship God the Father, His son Jesus, and the Holy Spirit.  If we are open to it, we stand to receive a multitude of grace and blessings, but this is not the primary reason for going.  That would be to worship God -- the One who has created each of us and placed each of us in our particular circumstances, whatever they may be.

Realizing this puts things in perspective when children are fussy or otherwise not as attentive to the goings on at Mass as we expect them to be.  It can be, we do understand, difficult for young children to sit through an hour-long Mass, but it is nonetheless important for them to be there along with us.  They are as much a part of the community as anyone else.

Setting them up for success in Mass goes a long way for everyone's sake.  Here are some of the things we try to do:

• make sure they're fed.  We usually go to 8am Sunday Mass, which leaves little time for dawdling beforehand, but we get them up in time to feed them something (here's where I reiterate my public service announcement about protein, too.).  Blood sugar levels on even keels go long ways in helping everyone have a good experience at Mass.
• pack some age-appropriate church-related reading material and quiet toys for the littlest ones, and make use of children's missals for those who are starting to (or can already) read
  
• point out things around the church, as well as quietly offer brief explanations of what's going on during Mass
• make our expectations clear for their behavior before walking through the door
• commend them on their attentiveness, respectfulness, and reverence when appropriate

Now that my elder lad is starting to read, I often have the hymnal or missal (which contains the texts of the readings and prayers) open and trace the words with my finger so he can follow along.  He is participating in Mass more each week, saying the Creed and other communal prayers, singing the Gloria, and listening to the readings and homily with keen interest.  Seeing him participate makes my Mass experience so much richer.  The greatest gift we can give our children is faith in the God who created each one of them and has a plan for each one of their lives.  To see him beginning to develop his own faith life gladdens my heart profoundly. 

Of course, things don't always go smoothly.  When one of them is really struggling, we excuse ourselves to regroup, but then we return to the pew for the remainder of Mass.  We don't expect complete silence and total stillness for an hour from these young children, and most of the time they are able to conduct themselves with reasonable decorum.  All the same, there is usually a fair amount of shuffling around from lap to lap, rummaging through the aforementioned bag of "amusements," and general whispering and whatnot.  These come with the territory, and from what I understand (and hope to be true) are not generally disruptive to other people as they create a sort of white noise rather than disturbances. This kind of stuff does distract Mama and Daddy, though, and we don't always catch the readings or homily in their entirety.  Sometimes we might even miss the Eucharistic Prayer if we're out placating a child or changing a diaper.  But we always come back for Communion -- the reception of Jesus in the Eucharist.  This is the whole reason for being there. 

Christ deserves our attentiveness and devotion.  He also knows each of our circumstances and realities and is present within them.  The grace we receive in the Eucharist is His gift to us -- noisy children and shuffling of their books and all.   Even if I feel like I've missed most or all of the Mass, reception of the Eucharist makes up for everything. 

Following Communion I offer this:

"Lord I pray You will strengthen me by Your presence within me to do Your will, and to be the person Uou call me to be for the people You place in my midst..."

*The Catholic Encyclopedia (OSV) states:

 The purpose of liturgy is diverse. First and foremost, it is to give glory and honor to God through prayer. Second, it is to build up the faith of the people. Third, it is to teach and instruct the faithful in the meaning of Christ’s word through the sacred mysteries.  Liturgy is not simply an intellectual act but an act of the whole person. The intellect, senses, and emotions are involved.

For further reading, check out What You Need to Know: Mass (The Sacred Liturgy).

unsolicited advice

We are expecting our fourth child sometime in mid- to late July.  Our elder lad thinks it will be another sister, but my father-in-law thinks it's a boy.  We shall see.  We have been surprised by the gender of each of our three children in the delivery room and anticipate another surprise.  After feeling *certain* that my second lad was in fact a girl the entire time I was gestating him, I think my intuition has been disabled.  I have no idea which gender our newest babe is.

Pregnant mamas are prime targets for unsolicited advice (though admittedly I haven't attracted quite so much this fourth time around).   Three children born within three and a half years of each other (the fourth is due about a month after our elder lad's fifth birthday) mean that I have gleaned some insights into how to manage the roller coaster of tummy troubles that I ridden with each pregnancy.  If these insights can be of any benefit to anyone else, this post will have served its purpose.

** Remember: I'm a pianist -- not a doctor -- so this is all based on what I've read and what I've experienced personally in this particular season of my mothering journey. **

I struggle with "morning" (more like all-day) sickness throughout each pregnancy.  My bambini in utero didn't seem to notice us having passed the first trimester mark; I was sick pretty much most of the time for the first three, and I have a prescription nausea drug that I'm taking now (as I have for two of the previous three pregnancies) that takes the edge off and helps me maintain some functionality.

I've read about (and experienced) links between "morning" sickness and blood sugar as well as morning sickness serving to dissuade pregnant mamas from eating foods that are allergenic or otherwise potentially harmful.  But when one has been spending not quality but quantity time with the commode and just can't seem to make the room stop spinning, what is there to do?

Being proactive goes a long way.  The main thing for me is to always have something in my stomach.  If I get hungry, I often get sick.  Eating is often the last thing I feel like doing when I'm nauseated, but ironically, sometimes it's what helps turn the tide, a little bit at a time.

For me, protein is very important.  Favorites of mine have included yogurt, cottage cheese, eggs (hardboiled or scrambled), other kinds of cheese, milk, nuts, beef, etc.  It's very important for me to moderate my intake of carbohydrates (even like cereals and bread) and try to have protein along with any carbs I'm eating.  Along those lines, fruits like apples and grapes treat me better than sugary things. And the adage to eat what sounds good often holds true for me, with the premise that the body craves what it needs.  When the cravings are for greasy, fried, sugary, or otherwise not-so-healthy things, I try to temper them by having a little but not too much. 

French toast, whole wheat pancakes with cinnamon for blood sugar stability, and breakfast casserole work well for me as breakfast (or anytime).  Some favorite homemade snacks of mine include chocolate peanut butter granola and breakfast cookies. 

I've always been inclined toward motion sickness, and ginger helps quell the nausea (except when I'm pregnant, when oddly it isn't as effective; it might be different for other women, though).  I take it in capsule form.  I find it at the health food store, but pharmacies may have it over the counter.  I've also read that B vitamins, especially B6 (I think -- remember what I said about not being a doctor) can be very helpful with nausea.  There are also these things called "sea bands" that I tried when I was pregnant with our elder lad.  I hadn't quite figured out the whole carb/nausea link then, though, and they weren't as helpful for me as I hear they are for other women.

When nausea gives way to heartburn, I've found papaya enzyme tablets *very* helpful, even more so that Tums.  Similarly, pineapple -- especially fresh, but canned is OK too -- helps with digestion.  Sounds weird, I know, but a nutritionist told me that.  The acids in the fruits help break down the food.  And lying on my left side sometimes helps when my tummy is upset.  I read somewhere that the stomach drains on the left side, so lying that way can help it do its thing.  (Sometimes I even try this with my newborns if they seem to be reflux-y or experiencing tummy troubles of other stripes.)

Riding the pregnancy sickness wave can be exhausting, but keeping things in perspective is key to survival.  One mama friend once told me that she was sick throughout several healthy pregnancies, but not during the one she ended up sadly miscarrying.  Whatever physical illness and discomfort we go through gestating these children God entrusts to us is, hopefully, temporary, relieved soon after delivery.  I know several mamas who have struggled with the sickness and physical unpleasantries of pregnancy who would be quick to say that the children they have since birthed have been worth all the toil.

I'm one of those mamas.

getaway

From the time I was a wee little lass, I traveled a lot -- mainly to Chicago to visit my family there, but to a few other places as well.  It was just my mom, dad, and me until my sister was born the spring before I turned 15.  My dad and I made many driving trips to Chicago and back when my grandfather was ill; I was five when he died.

I traveled to Chicago every chance I got: school breaks, summer vacations, anytime.  Being a part of the "doings" (as Grannie would say) was so fun for me -- even if we were just hanging out at her lake cottage, playing games or reading or swimming or whatever.  There didn't have to be anything big going on, even though trips into downtown Chicago and special events were always exciting.  Being together was the best part.

We have just returned from a two-day getaway to my parents' house about an hour from ours.  We all had such a great time.  It was very much like the happy times spent with my extended Chicago family, with kids and adults hanging out playing together, lots of food (including a decadent triple chocolate mousse cake my sister made for New Year's Eve), conversation, and fun.   We were sad to leave, but happy to return home. 

The logistics of traveling with three children under five (and soon to be four children five and under, as we are expecting a new arrival in mid- to late July) are ... formidable.  I can count on one hand the number of trips we've taken as a family.   For one thing, I've been pretty sick throughout each pregnancy, and the prospect of traveling like that has been simply unsavory.  Then there is the simple reality of traveling itself being stressful (nowadays, anyway), let alone with children who don't understand and therefore might resist the confines that are part of the territory.  This means, though, that I haven't been back to Chicago in a while (except a couple of short trips in the past five years), and I miss seeing my family there. Thankfully, most of them have traveled here at least once or twice in the same time period for the baptisms of our bambini or other special family events.

There is great value in learning flexibility and adaptability, and travel is one way of doing so.  I hope to help our children acquire these tools over time and through positive experiences such as the one we've just had.

I am most grateful for the comfortable home with which we are blessed.  It is our primary place of being.  Someday all too soon we might be running hither and yon, so for now I'm trying to keep myself squarely in the moment, relishing the time I have with these precious people all in one place.  These days are numbered.

Still, it was nice to get away.  The best part was simply being with our loved ones.  It has been refreshing, restorative, and energizing for the year to come -- one I pray will be filled with grace, peace, and joy for all of us, both at home and far-flung.